too close to home

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Last Thursday, my cousin Benny's wife didn't come home from work...there's a big search going on for her in Ofuskee County.  She was at the family reunion just a few weeks back.  Not only is she about the same age, but we also have the same first name.  Well, this afternoon they found a body of a woman along I-44 near Chandler.  They haven't announced yet who she is, but I am really hoping it isn't her... that just seems way too close to home.  A few weeks ago, this same cousin came home from work one night and when he flipped on the light switch in his house, the light didn't come on, and as he stepped back to check the switch, a bullet practically parted his hair.  Someone was in his house stealing his guns.  He gave chase and the thief wrecked.  Now there is speculation that the missing wife is somehow retaliation for the car chase.  The news isn't saying much yet, and i haven't been able to find anything yet on the internet about the identity of the woman found along I-44.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Well, on the news they just said that police have confirmed that the body found along I-44 was not my cousin's wife.  Still, she is someone's wife, mom, daughter or sister.  I am wondering if there is any connection between this woman's death and the murder of the two little girls in Weleetka about a month back.  Stuff like that just doensn't usually happen around here.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Here is a link to the story with a photo:
http://www.news9.com/Global/story.asp?S=8814507

[apaknad]

jesus homerown,

i mean i am from MI. and as i was growing up nothing EVER happen in OK. i am 61. what is going on?

[muldoon]

how awful Homegrown.  Were all hoping for the best for your cousins wife. 

It seems things are changing everywhere, for the worse for the most part.  I flew into Calgary this afternoon, and while out tonight I saw a fist fight on the street outside the bar, then on my walk back to the hotel this smelly blond girl in leather pants asked if I wanted company...  I guess its always been a crazy world to some extent, but for some reason I dont remember this much crazy in MY world ever.   

I worked in Muldoon over the weekend, is it wrong to just want to drop out of "civilized" life and live peacefully with the family? 

[glenn kangiser]

This about says it all.  Much of the outside world sucks.

Serj Tankian - Sky Is Over

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GY9kQcWLvEM

[peternap]

HT. prayers are with you and the family. Don't give up hope though because you never know until you know. The only kidnapping I ever worked on involved a woman with a severely retarded child. I had warrants for the ex boyfriend and had gone by one night to see if he was there. He was not. I went back early the next morning and the door had been broken down. The child was there alone and the house was torn up.
To make a long story short, the  ex boyfriend had come over drunk after I left and convinced the ex girlfriend to leave the kid and run away with him. A lot of worry and fuss over poor judgment.
Not that I'm suggesting that's the case in your family...just that you never know what happened until she turns up.

muldoon...there have always been fistfights and smelly blond girls. That's not what bothers me....Fistfights are simply a way of settling arguments. My mother used to telll me that only ignorant people used profanity and fought. I must be an absolute moron because I used to hone those skills to a fine edge.

Fighting IMHO saves lives. In our civilized society, people argue, hate and let it build up. Sometimes it explodes and they just shoot the other. A thirty second fistfight would have settled it from the very start.
I blame our Non-violent views for things like the Columbine killings and Va Tech. Everyone while growing up has had problems with bullies.In the old days, a trip to the parking lot and a fight that really amounted to a wrestling match, blew all the cobwebs out and everyone left friends. It's natural and the explosive outbreaks are the result of a buildup of emotions over time. Instead of the trip to the parking lot, they fulfill the wild, violent fantasies  we all have at one time or the other.   

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Well, I hate to say it, but my Mom was working out at her gym last week and a woman from Paden was there and was telling her that the rumor around Paden is that she was cheating on him and hired someone to knock her husband off and make it look like a simple robbery.  I can't imagine her doing that.  Like I said, she was at the family reunion just a few weeks back and they seemed just fine then.  So, I guess that there is some speculation that she's just run off with a boyfriend.  Even if there is a boyfriend, I just can't see her leaving her kids like that.  My cousin was worried enough that he took the kids and went to a relative's house to spend the night.  I guess the bullet from the robbery actually grazed his head and he's afraid that next time they won't miss.  Paden is in the middle of nowhere... everyone in that town is somehow related to me... it's not the kind of place where crime happens. 

Peter, I agree with you.  A simple fistfight could prevent many a shooting.    When I was in first grade, I got in a fistfight with two boys.  (I probably kind of provoked it, as I remember, by telling one of the boys that he thought he was TJ Hooker, the tv cop.)  Anyway, no one ever messed with me after that.  I was probably the least violent kid around, yet the reputation from that fight followed me all the way through school, and up until graduation, most of the boys were a little afraid of me, and even the girls left me alone for the most part.  I was surprised to hear one of my good friends from high school describe my reputation as being a tough girl for whom everything was always black and white and who didn't tolerate wrong.     Sometimes I don't think it was so much as I didn't tolerate it as it was that no one even tried to provoke me because they'd heard a rumor that I had a temper...?  Who knows.  I just know that there was never any need for me to prove anything after first grade.  Considering I was maybe six when that fight took place, I think it is funny that when I was 18, people still didn't want to mess with me. 

[glenn kangiser]

Small town news is very interesting sometimes, Homey.  Speaking of girls you didn't mess with:

There was a girl in grade school who I think liked me.   She wore these big old oxfords with about 1/2 inch thick leather soles.

I think she liked me because about every day she would kick me in the shins with those thick soled shoes.  Probably in love and just didn't know how to express herself.  I think a big ol' hug and a liplock would have sufficed.  My shins still hurt.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Must be like those little boys who used to pull my braids.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Well, still no leads on what has happened to her.  As I am reading online forums about the disappearance, more of the story about the robbery attempt leaks out and I don't know what parts are true and what isn't... several folks from around Paden posted that she was supposed to take a polygraph in relation to the robbery attempt and shooting at Benny on the day she turned up missing, hinting that she staged her own disappearance to avoid being caught in connection to the shooting/robbery.  Still, I just can't imagine that happening... she missed some of her kids' first days of school....  The way I see it is sure they've probably had problems.  What married couple hasn't?  There were terrible slanderous things written about both of them on the internet forum I just read.  However, I know that Benny is really worried and upset... I don't think he's involved in any way.  Tomorrow it will be a week since she went missing.  Really hope that she is found unharmed and returned home.

[peternap]

Prayers still going out HT.
I;m sure your worried sick and even a little embarrassed at the Blog posts. Take them with a grain of salt.

[apaknad]

we're still hoping for the best for the situation and you HT.

[benevolance]

These things usually come to some sort of conclusion.. in the Meantime try to find some peace and be well... Hope for the best

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Prayers still going out HT.
I;m sure your worried sick and even a little embarrassed at the Blog posts. Take them with a grain of salt.

Peter, I am more embarrassed by the local in the blog posts who insists on calling the concerned folks in California (some relatives on her side of the family) terrible names just because they insinuated that because there were no signs of a struggle that she might have taken a ride with someone she knew.  Heck, most of the stuff said about Benny was pretty much true (well, at least some of it... there's other stuff that I wouldn't know about...)  He's the one I'm actually related to.  The main stuff said about him was that he was stubborn and could be a jerk, but that he'd never hurt anyone, and I think that's all pretty much true.  I think someone read the CA aunt's post wrong and somehow took it as an accusation against the Davis family, which I don't think was a correct take on the whole thing.  Tonight they didn't say a word about it on the local news... I actually watched for a change.  They mentioned it yesterday and flashed her picture up on the screen.... but she hasn't even been missing a week yet and already it seems forgotten about on the local media.  There was some talk about using the bloodhounds from the Boley prison to try to track her, but don't think they've actually done that yet.  With all the rain earlier in the week, any scent left behind is fading fast.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

One of my great-aunts called over to see how everything is going.... Well, it seems that the sheriff's department thinks she staged her own disappearance, which sure as heck makes her look guilty as to the conspiracy to commit murder charges that were about to be filed against her.  She was due to take a polygraph that night regarding the guy who shot at my cousin a few weeks back.  She withdrew a bunch of money from the bank in the morning before she disappeared.  So, it's kind of like a soap opera...only you can't make this stuff up!  The sad thing is the three little kids who are the ones who really suffer for it.

[glenn kangiser]

Who'da thunk? 

[Sassy]

Pretty sad...  you never know, hope everything works out okay & it's just a lot of rumors...

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Well, I guess it is better for her if the story going around is true because that means she is definitely alive and well somewhere.  I don't know which is better for Benny and the kids... which is worse?  Your mom being abducted on the way home from work and disappearing off the face of the earth OR her being involved in a plot to kill your dad and take the insurance money and running away when she's about to be caught?  Kind of a toss up.  Myself, I really hope she's innocent, but she's less likely to be OK if that's really the case.  However, I think the kids are more likely to eventually be OK if that is the case.

[peternap]

If it is true, it will be hard on the kids. Children can be unbelievably cruel to each other. They'll need a lot of support, but they'll get through it and probably be stronger for it.

Prayers and hugs to everyone!

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Well, still no real leads on what's happened to my cousin's wife.  Do know that the OSBI is getting involved now.  Cousin found a letter from her apparently, and there is no word on what's in the letter....Haven't called Aunt Mary to find out any new news.  The media has been fairly silent on the whole deal, and the county sheriff's office is pretty tight-lipped but they don't act like they think she is in danger or has been abducted.  It's like some sort of soap opera, only it's real.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Been meaning to update this thread for a few days but kept forgetting.... Seriously, you couldn't make this stuff up.  Cousin's wife showed back up at her mommy and daddy's house after about six weeks claiming to have been abducted.  In her TV interviews on the local channels, she never mentioned why she is at her parents' house instead of home with her husband and kids... instead she shows off her chigger bites on her legs and says she was held captive in a "storage-type shed" and says, "It wasn't like I was shacked-up at the Holiday Inn.  I was not well cared for."  She had a few bruises, far less than the ones I always seem to have from just bumping into stuff while I'm working, but was trying to claim they were from beatings she's received. 

The letter she left on her husband's door a few weeks back was a makeshift will telling her husband that her "captors" weren't going to let her live and here's how to distribute her stuff.  Now you'd think someone who knew they were going to die in a violent manner would be concerned about telling her children and husband that she loved them and that she missed them and what she wished for their futures, but no, it was "give my car to so-and-so" etc. 

What the local television coverage has left out is that she showed back up in Paden before ending up in Mustang at her parents' house.  She broke into my great-aunt and uncle's house and made a bunch of long distance phone calls.  They ran her out when they caught her.  Then she showed up at one of her husband's aunts houses.  Apparently, she'd stolen one of her credit cards or something and run up bills on it while she was "kidnapped".  Don't know all the details on that, but do know that my cousin's aunt is filing some charges against her, both for breaking and entering and for theft.  Also, the newspapers reported several sightings of her in area casinos during her supposed captivity.  When the reporter on TV was asking her questions about the people who supposedly abducted her, she kept just saying that she didn't know who had kidnapped her but that she definitely HAD been kidnapped.  Now, one would think that if you'd spent 6 weeks being held against your will, you would have at least some idea if it was one or two or more people, perhaps at least some degree of a physical description, even if you hadn't seen their faces (tall, short, husky, skinny, something!)  And if you really thought those individuals were still at large, you'd be warning everyone to watch out for them.  She didn't act scared or upset at all in the interviews.  Instead, she seemed intent on convincing everyone that she'd been kidnapped "for real".  A doctor that her parents took her to confirmed that she had "thousands" of bug bites, but I say if you lay down with the dogs you're bound to get fleas.  Keep expecting to hear any day that she is being arrested.  Wonder how many thousands of dollars were wasted hunting for her that could've been better spent hunting for the guy that shot and killed those two little girls at Weleetka a few months back....  Anyway, I really feel for my cousin and his kids.  Have gained an ounce of respect for him I didn't have before because through all this he hasn't badmouthed her publicly at all.  In fact, he stood by her and looked for her earnestly through most of it, even though when it all comes out in the wash, it'll probably be proven that she tried to have him knocked off. 

  So, I guess in the long run, I am glad that she is OK and was found.  However, in some ways it might have been easier for her husband and kids if she really had been kidnapped.  Hope she gets the help she needs.  She is really messed-up.

[glenn kangiser]

What a drama.   ....but interesting.   Thanks for the update, Homey.

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

Makes for a funny story if it wasn't for the fact that there are little kids who can't help but be hurt by it all.  What a nut job.  DH was laughing so hard watching the TV interview with her that he actually snorted his drink out his nose... he kept saying, "See, I knew she just R-U-N-N-D-O-F-T"  I suspected as much but tried to give her the benefit of the doubt.  She keeps whining to the media about how she lost 20 lbs. during her "ordeal".  They should have kept her another six weeks and maybe it would have showed??  OK, so that was tacky, but she looked just as "healthy" as she did a few weeks before she went AWOL at the family reunion.

[glenn kangiser]

The sex or drugs must have been good, eh?  Too bad about the bugs though.  Should have shook out the sleeping bag.

Reminds me of my ex-sister in law.  Seemed to be from a different family from the ex-wife.