Am I a Texan?

[StinkerBell]

We own a house in Texas. I got my texas Drivers License, registered to vote. I have my vehicles register in Texas. I have two rifles. Just bought a Texas Long Horn Shirt. So, am I a Texan now?

[ScottA]

Yes

[Homesick Gypsy]

Technically speaking, you probably are a Texan.  However, unless you're born here in the Lone Star State, you're not a "Native Texan".   

[muldoon]

no, your not a texan, however you do get some extra credit for getting here as fast as you could.
No offense tho, remember that many fine men at the Alamo were not Texans by birth either - were a forgiving bunch. 

Some things that transplants are lacking, you might want to try them to get a fuller appreciation.   

pick up a 6th grade "Texas History" textbook somewhere and make some notes, then go on the trips to a few of the places.  Make the pilgramage to the Alamo, Jan Jacinto, Gonzales, Goliad, etc. 

Visit Gruene Hall

pick up some Shiner Bock Bohemian (black beer) and LoneStar - perfect the Texas black and tan. 

gotta be able to weld anything to a trailer and also be able to back it up.  I see the crazyiest stuff on trailers...  bbq's watertanks, little houses, houseboats... 

understand that if someone asks you if you want a coke, they will then ask you what kind.  Dr. Pepper is a perfectly fine answer for what kind of "coke" you want. 

perfectly normal to use the heater in the morning and AC during the afternoon. 

tex-mex.  nuff said. 

lastly, Dallas aint Texas, and Houston aint even close. 

and two rifles is great if you only have two rooms in your house..  bathroom and kitchen are covered, what about the rest?

-- it should be apparent this post is done in a tongue-in-cheek fashion and should not be taken seriously. 

[John Raabe]

Up here in Washington we think that all you have to do to be a Texan is get a big hat and boots... and maybe go "EEHHH HAW" while shooting a gun in the air.

But that may just be a stereotype we learn from the Simsons.

[bayview]

   Howdy!

   Y'all might live in Texas and have a Texas drivers license but do you "talk" Texan?  A native Texan could get all worked up and have a conniption if you hadn't lernt your Texas vocabulary, right quick.

   Don't forget your accent . . . And say thangs (things) like:

      Yup, he is all hat and no cattle.
      If it was a snake it'd have jumped up and bit ya.
      He looks like he was rode hard and put up wet.
      He is dumber than dirt.
      That lawyer was crooked as a dog's hind leg.

      Soon you'll be fixin to do somethin. 
      But don't over do it or you will get all tuckered out.

      You will want to drink upstream from the herd. 
      You won't want to squat if you have your spurs on. 
      And never, never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

   You will get plum wore out learnin this, but that's a whole nuther thang . . .   

   Eat Tex-Mex, plenty of BBQ with sauce, chicken fried steaks and fried okra.  Order your hamburger at What-A-Burger with mustard only, no ketchup or mayo.  Don't forget to eat plenty of chili and cornbread.  Sweet potato pie on holidays. 

   Years ago, you weren't Texan unless you had a rifle and a shotgun on the rifle carrier of your pickup.  Get a deer license.  The deer lease you will hunt on should be at least 1200 acres.  You will soon know the location of Cabela's and Bass Pro Shop.

   Get a pouch of Red Man.  And chew on it a spell.  You'll soon be chewin on one side and drinkin your Lone Star on the other.  Don't forget to have a miniature spittoon or an empty beer can on the dashboard or you could end up with tobacco stains on the side of your truck. 

   I have lived in Texas since 1983.  My best friend is a Texan.  I was best man at his wedding.  He still calls me a DAMN YANKEE.


/

[glenn kangiser]

I learned while drivin' truck through there that whenever someone says or does somethin' stupid you gotta say, "Must be a damn yankee.... " 

[StinkerBell]

We do have a Jeep and a Truck. Thats gotta be a plus!

[glenn kangiser]

You need "A shotgun, a rifle and a 4 wheel drive."  A country gal can survive....

[StinkerBell]

You need "A shotgun, a rifle and a 4 wheel drive."  A country gal can survive....

I have all these things!

[glenn kangiser]

I forgot -- another part of the song...

"I'd like to spit some Beechnut in that dudes eyes and shoot 'im with my ol' 45..."

Do you chew, Stinky?

[StinkerBell]

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww NO!

[glenn kangiser]

Hmm hmm That may still not disqualify you.... the ol' time Texans may have to answer that. 

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

That's OK, Stink.  If you don't want to start chewing and spitting, then you could always move north to Oklahoma.  Here we let people transplant, and you don't have to chew.  Also, you get a choice of which team to cheer on.  You're either an OU fan or an OSU fan, so you don't have to go strictly with burnt orange.... you could go crimson and cream or orange and black.  And, you don't have to sound like an Okie to consider yourself one.  My best friend's mom is originally from Switzerland and still has a heavy accent, though she's lived here a long time.  I saw her at an auction last weekend and she was telling me about her latest trip back to Europe.  She said that she and her husband had stayed for a month and a half, and when I had commented on what a nice, long vacation that was, she said, "Oh, after two weeks, I couldn't wait to get back home (Oklahoma)."  It made me grin.  But, if you want to be a Texan, just go ahead now.  I still like you anyway.

[glenn kangiser]

Hey, Stinky.  You might be a Texan.  You seem to be getting up a couple of hours too early.