(http://garmentguard.com/ProductImages/SBsquare.jpg)
From the brilliant minds at Garment Guard (http://garmentguard.com/) comes our newest product, Subtle Butt (http://garmentguard.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=23). This pack of 5 saving graces effectively filters the odor caused by flatulence; Simply stick it in the right place and you're ready for a chili cook-off.
Each 3.25" square filter is made of soft fabric with an antimicrobial treatment, on the side touching the skin. The fabric is impregnated with activated carbon, which faces the underwear or the pants and has a vast surface area for bad odors to adhere to and get neutralized. Two adhesive strips are strategically placed so you know which side is which. And at around 1/32" thick, you will never know it's there.
::) ::)
:o
The adhesive strips would be worse than the smell. OUCH!!
rofl rofl So, Don, are you sending some to Glenn for Christmas? Based on stuff from the What's for Dinner? thread, I think Sassy might appreciate it!
Glenn has been uncharacteristically silent on this topic. ??? ???
Sorry... I was working for a couple days and only had minimal forum time.
Obviously you guys are aware that Sassy made a big pot of navy bean, lentil and ham soup. [hungry]
Fortunately, Spike just had a little surgery so he has been in the room and very conveniently nearby so whenever I hear someone speaking behind my back I can quickly say, OH Spike, you shouldn't have.... [waiting]
Then this brings us to the next major issue I have with the product. Us knuckle dragging troglodytes would never allow strips of tape in that general area. Not only is there danger of someone thinking I bought a new bearskin rug when that tape is torn off but there is also the real danger of pain and screaming like a little girl when the appliance is ripped from my tender backside. [scared]
Nope - you don't want to see a grown troglodyte cry.... it's not a pretty sight. [crz]
There is also one more problem in our household or cavehold if you prefer. Sassy has threatened to put Beano in my food. [noidea'
No frikken way. I would have to have her arrested -- [slap] that is food tampering..... us troglodytes take great pride in being able to show our appreciation for a good meal. [burp]
Uhhh... the adhesive strips would attach the "filter" to the underwear. It would be up to the owner to establish the correct placement with accordance to their own particular peculiarities of their anatomy.
G'nite :D
There you go -- I'd have put it on backwards to prevent leaks. d*
....butt then, how do you prevent leaks? hmm --- The slightest leakage can be fatal.... [crz]
Caulking [idea]
Hey, thanks guys for the support! And Don, you might have saved my life! Now, to figure out how to get one to stay on the dog... ??? Glenn actually becomes threatening when I tell him I'm going to put BEANO in his food! [rofl2]
check out the video at this link... ;)
http://garmentguard.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWCATS&Category=8
Quote from: Sassy on December 19, 2008, 02:28:32 AM
check out the video at this link... ;)
http://garmentguard.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWCATS&Category=8
I just fell over with laughter when I veiwed this video. Been chuckling all day . . .
Quote from: MountainDon on December 19, 2008, 01:42:58 AM
Glenn has been uncharacteristically silent on this topic. ??? ???
Hmm missed part of this one last night --- head not clear I guess....
I forgot to say, "Silent but deadly, Don." [waiting]
Welcome to the dark side, bayviewps. [crz]
Quote from: Sassy on December 19, 2008, 02:28:32 AM
Hey, thanks guys for the support! And Don, you might have saved my life! Now, to figure out how to get one to stay on the dog... ??? Glenn actually becomes threatening when I tell him I'm going to put BEANO in his food! [rofl2]
check out the video at this link... ;)
http://garmentguard.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWCATS&Category=8
I note a failure to clarify things here on Sassy's part. None of those people in that video were me and I do not sell, use, or condone use of the product. [scared] rofl
Hey Whitlock, how'd you like my bean soup? heh I hear you've been censoring Flutterby n*
You want me to go there again Sassy, I'm not sticking my head in the loins mouth twice :-X
I will take the 5th heh
Wait a minute, Whitlock.... that's not allowed here.... you mean Lion's mouth. rofl
I liked your beans Sassy! BUTT, Whitlock needed one of those patches in his britches the night he ate some!!! or I needed a gas mask!
Quote from: glenn kangiser on December 19, 2008, 12:20:34 PM
Wait a minute, Whitlock.... that's not allowed here.... you mean Lion's mouth. rofl
Dang spelling :-[ d* That must of been funny :o And yes Glenn it was your falt that I miss spelled the word [slap]
I believe Mariposa county exceeded it's quota of methane that night.... [crz]
MY FAULT....... I think you have been listening to Stinky too much. [waiting]
Quote from: glenn kangiser on December 19, 2008, 09:29:02 PM
I believe Mariposa county exceeded it's quota of methane that night.... [crz
Don't say that the ACCB will want us all to wear a flatulence moniter and have it tested every 5 years.
Then you will surely be fined :-\
5 years??? I think they might need to check it on at least a monthly basis! But then you could just pay your carbon taxes d*
Hey, Al Gore, get a whiff of this.... [crz]
If they have a fabric is impregnated with activated carbon,the odor can make a stable too.
_________________
Furnace Filter (http://www.iaqsource.com/furnace_filters.php)
I think it's a dangerous device! >:(
Odor is added to gas to alert innocent bystanders of danger.
I remember when the Bass Pro Shop opened here. We ate dinner in the restaurant and I had fried Alligator tail. I didn't know it at the time, but alligator tail has a high fartigen content.
After dinner, we took the elevator to the second floor. The elevator is one of those glass enclosed things that moves up the side of the building. I was told by the EPA and Homeland Security, in a certified letter, that a green mist could be seen inside the thing as we went up. They also blamed me for all the fish dieing in the tank below the elevator..... ??? I still think that ugly woman staring at them was to blame for that.
Anyway, without the odor, people could have gotten on the elevator before the Hazmat team arrived, and been overcome.
This isn't something to be played with by amateurs ! It's dangerous.
Since Eskimos are high in fartigens, and killer whales have been eating them (Longline fishing boats have destroyed their natural food supply) They (The killer whales) have managed to BLOW A HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER.
Imagine the danger to passing ships, if there were no telltale smell to warn them.