Humor

[Homegrown Tomatoes]

   True story.  I have a friend who is a musician in Branson.  He was with a group of musicians raising money for MS and they were filming a portion of the fund-raiser as a PSA.  Shoji Tabuchi, the Japanese fiddle player, was among the group, and just before the filming began, Shoji turned to the audience to explain, "Now when I pray, you crap rear roud!"  My friend said that when the cameras started rolling half the audience was doubled over in their seats laughing hysterically.

[NM_Shooter]

Okay... apologies in advance.  This one qualifies as PG-13

-f-



The Transformative Effects of Marriage on the Y-chromosome.

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men....that night
all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, stilettos and mask over their eyes .

After a few days they meet again.....
The engaged girlfriend said: 'The other night, when my boyfriend came back home, he found me in the leather bodice, 4' stilettos and mask. He said, 'You are the woman of my life, I love you...then we made love all night long.'

The mistress stated: 'Oh Yes! The other night we met in his office. I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat, he didn't say a word. We just had wild sex all night.'

The married one then said: 'The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mother's for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes.

My husband came in from work, grabbed the TV controller and a beer, and said, 'Hey Batman, what's for dinner?'

[glenn kangiser]

Thanks for that one, Frank.



I needed that.

[John Raabe]

Is she a good cook too?

[glenn kangiser]

Does she have to?

[sparks]

My son sent this one to me. He's over *there* somewhere.

> I thought this was funny....


> Three men - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a Texan are all
> working together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops
> out of it. 'I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in
> total', says the Genie.
>
>
>
>
>
> The Canadian says, 'I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want the
> land to be forever fertile in Canada ' POOF! With the blink of the
> Genie's eye, the land in Canada was forever fertile for farming.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Osama was amazed, so he said, 'I want a wall around Afghanistan,
> Palestine, Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Americans or Canadians can
> come in our precious land.' POOF! Again, with the blink of the Genie's
> eye, there was a huge wall around those countries.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> The Texan says, 'I am very curious. Please tell me more about this
> wall.' The Genie explains, 'Well, it's about 500 feet high, 5o feet
> thick and completely surrounds the country. Nothing can get in or out;
> it's virtually impenetrable.' The Texan sits down, cracks open a Miller
> , smiles, and says, 'Fill it with water.
>

[yevgen]

> Three men - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a Texan are all
> working together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops
> out of it. 'I will give each of you one wish, which is three wishes in
> total', says the Genie.

Osama Bin Laden:



------------------------------

Yours faithfully...

[yevgen]

[yevgen]

[yevgen]

[yevgen]

[glenn kangiser]

Yevgen, what is the thought on Osama there?

Many here think he was dead long ago as Benazir Bhutto stated before she was assinated. 

He was a CIA asset, and his family was in business with the Bush family

Thanks  for your comments.

[yevgen]

Yevgen, what is the thought on Osama there?

Many here think he was dead long ago as Benazir Bhutto stated before she was assinated. 

He was a CIA asset, and his family was in business with the Bush family

Thanks  for your comments.

The theme "Humour" has smoothly passed in a theme of "Politician", whether not so?

[glenn kangiser]

Good catch, Yevgen.

[yevgen]

Excellent idea, whether not so?

[glenn kangiser]

That looks a lot like my cousin.  He's a plumber in Oregon.

[yevgen]

That looks a lot like my cousin.  He's a plumber in Oregon.

That plumber from anybody will not hide a place of the work.

And to it will have to recolour a door of a pickup as soon as it will change a place of work (for example, instead of a toilet bowl to draw office armchair as soon as it will be arranged with the manager in shop of office furniture)

[glenn kangiser]

Some self employed people here are a bit crazy.

[yevgen]

Look and admire!

-------------------------------------

The barge with coal floats...

It is pushed with a tow behind

Ahead - a leaf bridge

------------------------------------






The barge has passed, and the bridge... It is not dissolved!!! What to do? The captain does not surrender and unhooks the barge.

In fact the tow is a submarine







































-----------------------------------------

The brave captain of the barge...

And you so can?

[glenn kangiser]

That was a very good maneuver , yevgen.  Was that intentional? 

I saw it somewhere one time before if I recall correctly..

[glenn kangiser]

Found it -- true story - it was in Alabama.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/accident/towboat.asp

[yevgen]

Found it -- true story - it was in Alabama.

http://www.snopes.com/photos/accident/towboat.asp

http://echo.vsev.net/showthread.php?fid=29&tid=1677&old_block=0

[glenn kangiser]

Interesting - Here is a translator for our members who do not read Russian -- like me.

Paste the above link into the translate web page line on Alta Vista.

http://babelfish.altavista.com/babelfish/tr

[yevgen]

The Bermuda Triangle:

























----------------------------

Yours faithfully...

[yevgen]